I still rewatch episodes of “Seinfeld.”
The TV show that's thought to be about nothing actually brings attention to some important issues in its own comedic way, such as an episode where Kramer practices karate with children.
Unfair advantages in sports aren't funny, but “Seinfeld” made us laugh while showing the absurdity of Kramer dominating children in his karate class. Later, the children in Kramer’s karate class confront him in a dark alley and get their revenge. It's exaggerated for entertainment, but the underlying unfairness remains true.
The best players rise up through desire, effort, and determination. But there's a need for rules and coaching methods to create a fair playing field for all young participants.
In a recent Little League game, a player who was age-appropriate for the minors stood out because of his height. His coach let him pitch, and he threw faster than many older pitchers, intimidating the opponents.
He may have great potential, but few kids at this level have good control. They usually resemble Charlie Sheen’s “Wild Thing” character in “Major League,” especially when they overthrow.
Afterwards, two younger and smaller players were hit by the pitcher's throws. The pitcher himself was upset. Even though the harm was done, it was comforting to see his coach console him.
This is the type of leadership and sportsmanship we need, and it's where common sense and quality coaching come into play.
The pitcher could have thrown at a slower speed and still succeeded. It would enhance his control and prevent players from fearing the batter's box. Teaching him to pitch instead of throwing as fast as possible wouldn't crush his confidence, but motivate him to improve. There's more joy and accomplishment in throwing strikes than in hurling pitches off the backstop.
Most big kids are aware of their size and strength and careful about their interactions with others. They want to be part of the team, not a wrecking crew. Coaching them to play in a controlled manner won’t hinder their competitiveness, but teach them there's more to the game than brute strength.
At this age, it’s about teaching the basics of how to properly play the game. Winning is great, but secondary to providing a strong foundation the players can build upon as they move up to higher levels of competition.
The local Stingers Youth Wrestling Club and its coaches teach the right way. Their slogan is “We don’t lose. We learn.” That’s what youth sports are all about, and everyone can benefit from the Stingers approach.
Youth athletic coaches have the responsibility to instruct, encourage, and allow the kids to fail as much as succeed. This is crucial for the kids to improve, not for coaches to relive their past glory days.
Author Roger Kahn, in his classic book, “The Boys of Summer,” recounts the story of pitcher Joe Black who took his youth baseball team to a major league game. He sought advice from Casey Stengel, who advised him to teach the kids how to lose properly.
That’s where Casey thought the most important lessons were, and he knew this better than most since he led multiple teams to win the World Series, including the 1962 New York Mets expansion team that lost 120 games.
Black was a teacher, so he took Stengel’s advice seriously. On youth sports fields all over the country, however, we see many coaches stuck on winning at any cost instead of playing the game with honor and dignity. There is much more to sports and competition than the final score, especially for young people.
When players reach their last year of Little League eligibility, they have spent about seven years starting from tee-ball. They’ve shown their dedication and earned the right to enjoy their place at the top, but all too often are limited to playing only outfield and spending more time on the bench than many younger teammates.
I’m in favor of earning what you get, but believe the entire picture must be considered when starting lineups are written and substitutions are made. Loyalty earns respect.
There are players of all levels of ability and skill. But if a coach shows a lack of confidence in a kid he’s been supposedly coaching for multiple seasons, that’s more of a reflection on the guidance than it is on the youngster. Too many kids leave organized youth sports broken, dejected and lacking confidence when they should be remembering those times as among the best in their lives.
When Green Bay Packers legendary coach Vince Lombardi said, “winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing,” he was talking about professional athletes, not kids taking their first few steps up the competition ladder. Still, many youth sports coaches play the games as though it’s the World Series, Super Bowl or World Cup final.
There is nothing wrong with trying to win. It is not as simple with youth athletics, though, and those coaches who do things the right way are to be commended. They win some games, but more importantly, they help develop good people. We need more coaches like them.
There is a famous sign encouraging Notre Dame football players to “play like a champion today,” not win at all costs. When we teach our young people to play like champions, no matter the outcome, there is no way they can lose.
Remember, we don’t lose, we learn.
